Finding the Right Mother’s Day Card

Finding the Right Mother’s Day Card

Finding the right Mother’s Day card has given me a headache in past years, especially if I waited too long and the selection was getting sparse. This year is different.

A Chance Meeting

Earlier this week, I was in the Hallmark aisle at Publix, selecting a Mother’s Day card for Mom. As I approached the section, I noticed a 30-ish young woman who seemed mildly exasperated.

“Sometimes it’s hard to find the right one,” I said.

”Yeah. My mom is a Strong Mother. All these gushing messages don’t ring true for me.”

”Don’t I know it!”

”The Strong Mother cards are near the bottom,” she added.

We said goodbye behind our colorful, handmade masks and I started my quest.

A Strong Mother

Her phrase, a strong mother, had made an impression. Rather than feeding a judgement about her mother, she had given our shared reality a positive spin.

Now I was in a different mood, focused on the best thing about my relationship with my mother. Laughter. We share a lot of wholesome, good-natured, joyful, loving, laughter. It was easy to find a funny card to make us both smile.

How Did My Mood Change?

Finding the right Mother’s Day card is a shared experience, especially among women. That was evident when the lady on the card aisle had two cards in her hand; one for her mother and one for her mother-in-law. In this shared energy, we were both open to share our feelings.

Be open to accept positive energy

Additionally, I have taken many small steps toward forgiveness in regards to Mom. She did the best she could do. I did the best I could do as a human being and a mother. And you are doing the best you can do.

Forgiveness of others opens up forgiveness of yourself

Finally, realize that forgiveness is incremental in nature. The relationship between a mother and her children is complex, taking many small steps to unravel until the last trace of hurt and anger are gone. Along the way, find ways to bring joy into the relationship right now.

Live in this moment with joy

Enjoy Yourself!

Whether or not you are a mother, you deserve happiness everyday, including Mother’s Day. Start the day with some deep, cleansing breaths and welcome joy into your life. Regardless of who raised you, thank your birth mother for bringing you into the world. Then continue to thank her or whomever cared for you… They helped you arrive where you are today.

If this is just too hard, take one step toward forgiveness by writing out your feelings on paper. Keep writing until you feel better, until the tears come less, until your body says, “That’s enough for today.” Repeat this tomorrow.. or next week.. whatever feels right to you.

Love and blessings,
Dawn

Three Tips on Finding Your Values

There are many, but today I’m sharing three tips on finding your values. This step is crucial to living a fulfilled life. For me, I had vague ideas on what was most important to me.

The Three Tips

  1. Understand the concept of values
  2. Explore your personal values
  3. Hone in on your top three to five values

What Are Values Exactly?

I want to be clear, I’m talking about personal values that serve as the basis for our goals toward achieving fulfillment and ultimately our life purpose. This article on Physiopedia.com is an in-depth explanation of personal values and beliefs.

Furthermore, values are what you feel is important to you.

How Do Values Affect Me?

If your thoughts and actions are in synch with your values, you are happier, that is, you are calm, centered, content.

Conversely, if your thoughts and actions are based on the values of others, you may be anxious, unsettled, jittery. Empaths are often unduly influenced by the values of others. My blog about empaths will help you discover if this is your reality.

How Do I Discover My Values?

Here is a list of values with further hints on using it. Now, let’s get to it!

  • Gather a notepad and pen or pencil
  • Find a quiet place and sit upright
  • Close or soften your gaze
  • Take three slow cleansing breaths
  • Relax your neck and shoulders
  • Sink into your hips and feet
  • Notice how your body feels
  • Slowly open your eyes and start reading each value aloud
  • When a word resonates somewhere in your body, write it down

My Three Values as Example

Here are my values; Honesty, Tranquility, and Purpose

If I follow these values in my thoughts and actions, I’m extremely happy and carefree. It’s fairly easy if I’m alone and in complete control of my environment. Rather, since I don’t live a monastic life alone, I often struggle to live these values.

Let’s see examples where I’m successful:

  • Honesty: I use my love of creative cooking to create a healthy, gluten-free, dairy-free salad for lunch.
  • Tranquility: While caught in Interstate-4 traffic, I tune into the Spa channel on Sirius XM, smile, and calmly allow merging traffic to, well.. merge.
  • Purpose: Quiet morning time is spent meditating and writing my blog.

Now for the opposite:

  • Honesty: Feeling stressed, I open my overhead kitchen cabinet where ‘fun foods’ like wasabi peas and dark chocolate are stored and grab something, stuffing it in my mouth before anyone sees my loss of control.
  • Tranquility: While caught in Interstate-4 traffic, I tune into the 70’s on 7 channel on Sirius XM, pound my palms on my steering column, and switch lanes over and over to ‘get ahead’.
  • Purpose: Quiet morning time is spent checking email, all my social media channels, reading newspaper headlines and getting sucked into someone else’s drama.

Is There a Theme Here?

Absolutely. The theme is self-care. Once I discovered my values, all I needed to do was practice self-care by respecting myself and these values. And yes, I fall off my self-care regimen all the time, forgetting to honor my values. Above all, I start again.

May you explore my three tips on finding your values and use the list of values to discover a calmer way to live with ease.

With honesty, tranquility, and purpose,
Dawn