Never worry whether you can boldly follow your way in life. Each of us finds our level of boldness.
Boldly Follow Your Way in Life
Does this headline scare you or expand your heart space? These two reactions are right next to each other. One step forward brings you closer to expansion.
Sometimes, the unknown future keeps us rooted in a spot of fear.
How to Overcome Fear
Fear lives in our thoughts about the future. We feed our fear by choosing to question our power.
What if I don’t know the answers to the test? How will I perform in the new job? I don’t know anyone in my unique situation. How will I make new friends?
Instead, use your thoughts to review a personal triumph or known success of others.
I’ve done well on tests before. Every new job has a learning curve, and my new manager knows that. Once I’m in a unique situation, the unknown becomes the known. I’ve made new friends before by following my interests.
One Simple Tool Helps
Since fear lives in our thoughts of the future, we use a tool to live in the present. This tool helps you boldly follow your way in life.
- Taking one deep breath brings you to the present.
- Lower your gaze to the floor, and take another deep breath.
- Continue to breathe normally, noticing how your body reacts.
- Bring your focus to your breath, whether you can feel the breath at your nostrils, the rise and fall of your belly or your lungs filling with air.
Of course, you must be in a safe place when you use this simple tool. So safety is your first concern.
Practice This Tool Often
How many times have you practiced something before you needed it? For example, did you play with dolls as a child, practicing how to be a parent? Or perhaps you made mud pies and practiced cooking.
By spending time each day practicing mindful deep breathing, you can more easily live in the moment.
Some people call this meditation. You can call it whatever you want. It’s your life and your choice to follow your way in life boldly.
Give yourself credit each time you make forward progress, and forgive yourself when you stumble. We all have ups and downs. Take time to celebrate every improvement. You are worth it.
I support you dear friend. Doesn’t that feel comforting? Indeed, it is comforting both for the recipient and the person giving support.
Why Does This Feel So Good?
As I’ve mentioned before, energy is everywhere. It exists in all living things, Furthermore, energy is the basis of non-living things; rocks, the air we breathe, furniture… everything. Basic chemistry explains the movement of electrons around the nucleus of atoms.
Like the atom, energy has positive and negative aspects. Within living and non-living things, there is a state of equality. Otherwise, the atoms become agitated and start breaking up. Conversely, it’s the state of salt changing when you place it in water. Although it appears to disappear, tasting the water proves it is still there.
What Happened to the Salt?
The state of the salt changed because it separated into its positive and negative components, Sodium (Na+) & Chloride (Cl-), The same type of separation occurs when you dissolve sugar in water. Below is an illustration of how these very small pieces can move across a semipermeable layer. Think of how a net outside the Great Barrier Reef allows small fish to pass through, while keeping the beaches safe from Great White Shark attacks.
Where Were We?
How do these science examples explain the positive feeling of “I support you, dear friend”?
In the world of energy, my positive feeling of support spread out across the Universe, reaching your energy field. The effect was boosting the volume of positive vibes. The difference between this and the science analogy is I didn’t lose any joy (positive energy) when I sent it to you. Rather it multiplied for me too.
Let’s Try This Together
Although it is great to support others, I’m going to invite you to start with yourself.
- Sit in a comfortable position where you feel safe
- Gently close your eyes
- Slowly breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth
- Say, “I support you dear (your name)”
- Feel the positive energy
- Repeat, repeat, repeat
Practicing loving kindness feels better… than being caught up in comparing. Compulsive comparing creates a restlessness that can never be satisfied.
Examples of Compulsive Comparing
Do you know someone who has an immaculate house? Imagine after visiting them or just thinking about them, you might have these thoughts walking inside your own less than perfect home.
- How does she keep everything so clean?
- It really feels bad, seeing all the dust in my house
- I know there’s a candy bar hidden here someplace…
If only we could substitute these thoughts of loving kindness for ourselves instead.
- Perhaps I care about more important things than housework
- But, if I set a timer for 30 minutes and sweep…
- After the timer goes off, I’ll fix a cup of coffee… or herbal tea
Did you feel a difference reading these two very different lists? For me, the comparing list made me frown and furrow my brow.
The second list brought a smile to my face and a lightness in my chest. It’s about offering forgiveness for ourselves.
How to Bring Loving Kindness Home
Mindfulness meditation is the key to bringing loving kindness into your life. Sharon Salzberg is my go to person for learning how to cultivate loving kindness. I’ve completed her 10% Nicer meditation course inside the app, Ten Percent Happier , multiple times.
She has also written several books on loving kindness, available on her website . If you want to experience a ten minute mediation right now, go to A Simple Meditation to Connect With Loving-Kindness, from Sharon Salzberg on mindful.org.
This Seems Too Easy
Yes, it is easy… and also very hard. Like most things, it takes a daily commitment to change. However, if you miss a day, don’t beat yourself up. Rather, start again. Each day dawns with another new opportunity to live happier.
Practicing loving kindness feels better… than comparing ourselves to others. Just think what a different world it would be if you practice loving kindness for yourself and others. Start right now.
Sending you loving kindness,