Category: Living My Inspired Life

Do the Work

How often have you heard “Do the work” concerning self-discovery and healing? Our reaction varies depending on the circumstances. I’ve felt confused, angry, and determined. Now I feel a deep sense of understanding from digging deep into my shadow side.

A Piece of the Journey

Today I’m offering a glimpse into my experience that may provide hope. First, of course, it would be nice if I could hand you an action list for finding your direct route to do the work. But, for me, the trip has been circuitous.

As I started writing, I was sidetracked by a desire to look back at the first time I saw my natal chart. Then, I was drawn to reading my notes from the astrologer C. A. Brooks. Finally, I remembered to date my notes. It was June 11, 2014, in Denver, Colorado.

Pondering the phrase, be the teacher and student, reminded me how much I’ve learned by sharing here. Other words loomed; balance, refine, leadership, allow. When desired behaviors are challenging, they come up again and again.

How I Dug Deep

On May 5, 2021, I had a session with Katie Klein on using the Radical Forgiveness worksheet developed by Colin Tipping. Again, I felt the potential for deep healing during the process but also my resistance. So, like the organized person I am, I saved the file and didn’t think about it again until recently. Multiple times, I’ve heard references to Radical Forgiveness. So, I took action.

Over the last month, I’ve completed four worksheets with my most significant relationships. But I’m not finished. So there is a blank one sitting on the table next to me. It isn’t intimidating, but I like having it handy when my intuition says, “It’s time.”

How Did I Know it was Working?

It was emotionally and physically painful. As I read each step on the worksheet aloud, the answer came to my mind. Then I surrendered to the deep emotions. Between the tears and gasps for air, I vocalized my feelings and wrote them down.

I’m not alone in this. Fellow healers Meredith Johnson, Migdalia Rodriguez, and Mary Toland Shaw support my shadow work with personal healing sessions and spiritual coaching. Their insight, compassion, and comfort brought me more profound healing of old wounds.

In the past, I’ve sought clinical therapists who also helped me through more obvious turning points; post-menopausal depression, the suicide of my spouse, and sudden public emotional outbursts.

Please, don’t give up. You deserve happiness and fulfillment. Your unique experiences are gifts to open, appreciate, and move forward with the universe’s support. Each step brings you closer to the life you are meant to enjoy.

Discover Your Uniqueness

I invite you to click on any healing modalities I’ve mentioned. Or, if you feel too overwhelmed, follow this guide to calm your anxiety and further explore your next step.

With love and compassion,
Dawn

Dealing with Profound Sorrow

When dealing with profound sorrow, we notice anniversaries of the day they left our lives. It’s not something we easily ignore. Nor should we. This week I marked the first anniversary of my husband Wayne’s death.

This is Not Easy

Every event in our lives has the potential to help us understand ourselves better. I’m taking small steps forward in my grief, gently buoyed by the stream of my tears. Today’s step is a review of what I’ve learned in the last year.

The biggest lesson I learned was the importance of listening to my intuition.

I believe intuition is how God answers you when you pray. We pray for help. We pray for change. We pray for courage. But sometimes, when we pray, we ask questions. We understand that the end of life is inevitable for all of us, but we still ask why.

Although I believe that our time on Earth is predetermined, our choices can affect the number of times we stumble and fall along the way.

Forks in the Road

How do we move forward when approaching a fork in the road? Do we go right, left, or blaze a new trail through the woods? Those are our choices to make.

When dealing with profound sorrow, it might be time to sit at that fork in the road for a while. Then, even turn around and lovingly look behind us at other life choices, choosing to soothe ourselves by wrapping our arms in a self-hug when we believe we took the wrong path.

But was it the wrong path? Or was it simply one of two choices that return to the same place you are today? There were times when if I had listened to my intuition, the path would have been smoother.

There’s another thing I’ve learned about grief. It doesn’t follow a prescribed trajectory. It doesn’t have the same peaks and low spots as the last life sorrow. It can be so different for each person and each experience. It seems the reason is self-evident since every experience changes you.

I have finally learned there is wisdom in looking back and examining your choices, not by self-deprecating, but in understanding yourself better. How can we change if we do not question our lives?

An Exercise

So I invite you to look back on a defining sorrow in your life

How do you do that? You take out some paper and a pencil or a pen and start writing about it. Here’s a question to help you get started.

What did I feel when I first heard the news of their passing?

Write about this as long as you want; cry, scream, punch some pillows. Get it out onto the paper, and let it go.

Remember that the soul of your loved one is free. They are not unhappy because emotions are something that we feel in our bodies, and they no longer have a body. But I believe their love and care for you is never-ending.

Thank them for their love.

Feel that love.

Take it One Step Further

And then remember something they loved to do. Choose a happy moment that you remember. Perhaps they loved to hold their dog, take a nap, or walk in the woods and marvel at the wonders of nature.

I was thinking about when Wayne and I were in La Garita, Colorado. Wayne had permission to fish in a pond stocked with trout. He came home with a beautiful catch and asked for a photo before I made trout almandine. Then, he extended his arms to make the fish appear even more prominent. I laughed then and again now at the memory. It was so Wayne.

Returning to the here and now, I raised my coffee mug and said, “This one is for what you taught me. This one is for you, Wayne. I love you. Thank you for being in my life.”

When I finished my toast, I saw a cute little snowbird looking down at me from the gutter outside the window. And I thought that was a sign that Wayne was laughing too. Why? For native Floridians like Wayne and me, winter visitors from the North are called Snowbirds. But, unfortunately, they were not Wayne’s favorite Florida reality.

I hope this article gave you solace and eased your experience dealing with profound sorrow.

I invite you to signup for my newsletter, so you don’t miss future blogs.

With love and compassion,
Dawn

Filling Up Your Self-love Tank

How are you filling up your self-love tank?

Taking a month off from writing my blog was about self-love through inaction. But how can you actively fill up your self-love tank?

The last month has been a time of reflection, healing, and slow integration into my local community. So it was a perfect time to focus on self-care.

Since February is referred to as the month of love, I wanted to start this blog with how I spent my afternoon on Valentine’s Day.

First, I visited the Coast to Coast Impressionism Exhibit in the Blowing Rock Art and History Museum. For at least a year, I’ve wanted to see it. What do you think stopped me? Conversely, why do you think I went on a holiday about love? How did you spend Valentine’s Day?

HOW I FELT DURING MY VISIT

I felt connected to the locations as I slowly wandered through this exhibit. The western scenes brought me back to my years in Colorado, including the many weekend trips to visit my parents, who had moved to La Garita, Colorado, from Polk County, Florida.

The eastern scenes are closely related to my current area in North Carolina. And the still life paintings transported me to fond memories of painting in oils during my thirties in West Orange County, Florida.

My heart expanded throughout my wanderings, including the history exhibit and photography winners on the second floor. There wasn’t a bit of sadness. Instead, I felt gratitude and appreciation for my decision to feed my soul. I thought, “This is one way of filling up your self-love tank.”

Looking at all the beautiful art made me thirsty and hungry. Since it was a little after 4 pm on Valentine’s Day, my options were limited. I had noticed a neon ‘OPEN’ sign at Six Pence Pub just as I turned the corner off Main Street toward my favorite parking area. The thought of authentically British Fish and Chips had been on my mind for weeks.

The staff was attentive and helpful before their busy time ahead. My Guinness Black and Tan was fantastic, and the array of Royal Doulton Toby mugs before me kept me busy trying to identify them. Of course, I recognized Churchill but had no idea it was explicitly the #9 Churchill Bulldog jug of the year for 1992.

But it was King Henry VIII and his six wives that required opening up a Google search. I only missed two.

Which Toby Mug caught your attention first?

WHAT ELSE STANDS OUT IN FEBRUARY?

I’m the queen of self-discovery through online personality tests. Besides being entertaining, the results explain why I like them so much! I digress.

When I took Strengths Finder 2.0 in 2009, I discovered my strengths: Learner, Harmony, Input, Connectedness, and Relator.

  • Yes, I love learning new things, including reading all the texts in the museum. (Learner)
  • Looking at the Toby mugs lined up before me, I smiled. (Harmony)
  • Researching facts about the Toby mugs makes my day! (Input)
  •  Please let me know your thoughts on this blog in the comments or signup for my newsletter. (Connectedness)
  • Socializing is important to me, even if social media is currently my primary method. Follow me, and I’ll follow you! (Relator)

Therefore, it’s not surprising that I signed up for three online courses last month. The first one I’m delving into is The Complete Guide to Smartphone Photography. Once before, I signed up for a similar approach that was deeply into social media sharing. However, I quit within a few weeks. Why? Because I kept comparing my results to the other 10,000 people in the course!

Using Portrait and Noir

One of the assignments involved using each of the possibilities of my iPhone native camera application. I found the Noir filter while using the Portrait mode. Do you ever use filters on your Smartphone?

I can’t end with a colorless photo. Spring bulbs are blooming everywhere in the Blue Ridge Mountains. Sunny daffodils catch my attention as I drive on familiar roads. Their cheerfulness is welcome after a dreary, wet winter. And almost no snow at my elevation.

But the Iris reticulata I planted last fall have popped up, releasing their cheerful colors. Although they are small and not so easy to spot, I imagine the bulbs multiplying over the next few years to offer a field of blue and purple on the hillside beside my driveway.

How are you filling up your self-love tank? I’d love to hear about it in the comments.

With love and compassion,
Dawn