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Embrace Your Darkness to Shine Brightly

Do not fear the darkness of your life, for it allows your brightness to shine. This is the theme of The Dark Side of the Light Chasers by Debbie Ford.

I was a prisoner of my own making, spending my life looking for acceptance and love from without rather than from within. This is where true love exists, only within ourselves.

Once we accept and fully acknowledge our love of ourselves, we can both give and receive love from others.

Furthermore, I wish to share with you one of the ways that I have come to discover who I am. It’s a simple reality that has allowed me to begin this new life journey as a complete soul.

Embrace Your Darkness to Shine Brightly

How many times have you felt the judgment of the actions of others creep into your mind?

Do you turn away from this behavior in yourself, willing it to stop?

Judgment is a good and wholesome activity if used properly. For example, we might walk into oncoming traffic while crossing a street without judgment. Or eat unwholesome food left too long in the refrigerator.

Employing judgment allows us to use our senses to keep us safe.

Judging the Acts of Others

Perhaps you think it can never be good to judge others. However, this is a valuable tool allowing us to peek into our psyche. When we dislike something in others, it’s often a reflection of our self-loathing.

So how can we come to grips with this darkness inside us? I have found a way to embrace my darkness to shine brightly through compassion.

Compassion is caring about something we might not feel warm and fuzzy about. And like all feelings, there is a certain amount of choice within us on how we think.

A Real Life Example

While working in Denver, Colorado, I took the train from Littleton Station. Then, getting off at Auraria, I walked the six blocks to my job at the Police Administration Building. On the way, I passed through the intersection at Speer and Colfax, which was notorious for panhandlers.

Drivers avoided eye contact by staring straight ahead or picking up their cell phones as if on a call. As a pedestrian, I felt vulnerable when waiting at a red light, and I often changed my pace or route to avoid standing near someone asking for money. If I was in a car, I often acted like most other motorists, staring at the stoplight to avoid eye contact.

Billy and the Denver Rescue Mission.

When walking, I didn’t feel safe giving them money. But one summer morning, I was carrying a bouquet from my garden. It was impossible to make the green light as I approached the intersection. So, I impulsively offered the man who asked me for money a daisy instead. His entire demeanor changed as he asked me to wait. Finally, I watched him run to a hedge on the edge of a nearby fast-food restaurant where he had stowed his backpack.

Running back toward me, he carried a half-full plastic water bottle. I chose a couple of my nicest daisies and placed them into his makeshift vase as his face shone brightly with a huge smile. This simple act of compassion infused my day with a feeling of peace. And the memory is as fresh today as it was eighteen years ago.

How Compassion Affects Us

Do you think the drivers sitting in their cars on Colfax Ave dared to look our way as this gift of compassion and love was exchanged between us? If you were driving down Colfax, would it change how you judged this man? Would it change how you saw the gray-haired woman walking with the hand-picked flowers? Would it change how you interacted with people in your workplace or your family members?

Most importantly, would you feel better about yourself?

When you embrace your darkness to shine brightly, it’s easier to open the door to self-compassion. For example, after giving the gift of my beloved flowers, it was easier to accept my judgment and to open up to the humanity of others.

With love and compassion,
Dawn

Let Your Light Shine Forth

Let your light shine forth, dispelling the darkness of winter. There is much to learn from our dark side, but don’t we still want the light to reign?

December Can be Difficult

There is a dash to buy gifts, mail holiday cards, maintain inclusiveness, and exhibit a perfect attitude. Add in all those unfortunate birthdays, and it’s a bit too much.

How do you think you can make your life less hectic?

I’ve chosen to concentrate on what truly brings me joy. For example, I considered putting up the Christmas tree but then decided I wanted light, not the hassle of a decorated tree.

The alternative to a tree was more greenery inside and LED candles in my windows. It reminds me of my summer visits to Sweden, where I saw this tradition in practice. As Sweden is quite far north, the hours of daylight in the winter are few. So lights in the windows are cheerful and welcoming, lighting the way home.

Furthermore, I concentrated my decorations in my dining room. Christmas cards are a favorite activity for me. It allows me to check in with people I care about but don’t communicate with regularly. Since my birthday is in December, I place those cards next to the holiday cards. Sitting at the table, I light my Advent Wreath, enjoy the birds at my feeders, and feel the love radiating from the wishes of loved ones.

What About Your Internal Light?

Brightening the world with your bright white internal light is a great way to elevate your mood and the mood of others.

But how do you achieve this? It takes work, understanding yourself, contemplation, meditation, grounding, and dispelling the fear of knowing who you are.

I have found help from books, other lightworkers, and practice. Meditation helps me calm my inner critical voice. Reiki helps me learn how to move energy throughout my physical body. Journaling opens the door to my intuition.

Make a List of Your Spiritual Gifts

My friend and one of my spiritual helpers, Mary Toland Shaw, asked me to make this list. At first, I felt confused, but then I realized it was anything that filled my heart with joy.

  • Writing this blog
  • Smiling for no particular reason
  • Buying myself flowers
  • Talking to friends and family
  • Watching the birds at my feeders
  • Wearing bright colors

Here is a perfect example. I was in my local grocery store when my aunt called. As we conversed, I picked a bouquet and added it to my cart. Then as I neared the dairy section, a man I’d never seen before smiled at me and said, “Ever since you picked up those flowers, you’ve had this big smile on your face!”

We laughed and went on our separate missions to complete the shopping. Since it was my birthday, I picked out my free ice cream.

I wasn’t trying to be joyful. Instead, the circumstances allowed my inner white light to shine. But I made a conscious choice to create my environment.

Won’t you find ways to let your light shine forth? You will benefit. The people near you will benefit. And the ripple effect will make the world a brighter, happier place.

With love and compassion,
Dawn

You are a Beautiful Soul

Mom, you are a beautiful soul too. This was evident while planning her memorial service, especially as family and friends gathered to remember her.

You are a Beautiful Soul

Remember that you are a beautiful soul when you start feeling less than your perfection. Because when your life is done, it’s the memories of your beautiful soul that remains.

The First Decision

It was just me when Mom breathed her last. My husband passed three months and three days earlier. My sister had moved to be close to the birth of her first grandchild, and I had moved to a new life in North Carolina. That sounds as lonely as life can be, but there is a unique peace amid loneliness. It allows deep healing.

Waiting until the Saturday after Thanksgiving also gave me time to process the loss of my husband and mother. It helped make it a true celebration of her life. After that, the first decision of place was easy.

Texas, Alaska, and Florida cousins
Texas, Alaska, and Florida cousins

Mom grew up in Winter Haven, Florida. It was where she worshiped, and it was my birthplace. So many relatives were close, and those far away could get time off work. It seemed a perfect time.

Holiday Realities

My wedding was six years prior, also right after Thanksgiving. I conveniently forgot about the difficulties during the planning phase. It’s a time when businesses other than retail aren’t always available.

Catering became a hurdle in the week before Mom’s memorial. Suddenly, the restaurant closed for the holiday weekend. Scrambling over the phone with the church administrator, she found a last-minute substitute. Then the plan for dessert fell apart. A change from coconut custard pie to various cakes solved this latest snafu. Some of these calls were while I was at a gas station on my way to Florida the Thursday before Thanksgiving. Oddly, I wasn’t flustered by any of it.

Everything worked out beautifully. Some expected to attend but didn’t show, and a few new, treasured guests were able to make it.

Time Gave Me Space

Compared to my grief at my husband Wayne’s memorial, I felt almost blissful this time. Instead of hiding in the back room for grieving family, my sister and I welcomed guests in the church narthex. my son Larry and IHere’s a photo of my younger son, Larry, and me by the sign-in book. Since Mom had been using a weekly calendar as a diary, I chose to use the 2022 book, placing it next to her framed photo.

Many people mentioned how lovely the service was. Part of the success came from a long phone conversation with Pastor Reich. So many small details flowed forth as he asked me questions about Mom’s life. It was like a review of everything that I loved about her. He wove her personality and small acts of kindness into a fabric that was her life. It was then I realized, Mom, you are a beautiful soul.

I told my mother how much I loved her many times while caring for her during the last few years. And she reciprocated.

Take the time this week to tell someone you love them. Give them a warm hug if you can. If they are too far away, wrap your arms around yourself and say, “You are a beautiful soul.” And know that you are a beautiful soul too.

Love,
Dawn