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Your Most Important Relationship

Your most important relationship is how you feel about yourself.

Perhaps you are thinking, “I’ve heard that one before!” Regardless, it bears repeating. The love we have or don’t have for ourselves affects the quality and success of all other relationships.

Early Relationships

Parents certainly rank up there in importance. We are born pretty helpless compared to other mammals. We all depend on mother’s milk, which is uniquely perfect for infants. Even if that doesn’t work out, the baby formula helps us grow. It’s the care and comfort of our caregiver that makes us thrive.

If there are older siblings, they can be important too. But are they confident of the love they receive? Is there enough love to go around?

What’s Different for You?

We need a particular set of circumstances to thrive. However, the basic need for food, water, and shelter are the same—the type and amount of affection need variation.

For instance, my older sister was the first grandchild near our paternal grandparents, who lived next door. When I came along twenty months later, the female caregivers in my life were overwhelmed. Dad took up the slack.

My favorite photo is of Dad giving me a bottle when I was two weeks old. He’s smoking a pipe with cherry-flavored tobacco. I’m propped up on his knees as he’s relaxing in bed. My face lights up, fixated on his smile and the smoke drifting upward.

To this day, I love the smell of cherry-flavored tobacco. Furthermore, I find the scent of cigarette smoke pleasant.

Accept All Aspects of Yourself

Even if it’s politically incorrect to enjoy the smoke, I’ve learned it’s okay for me. I also realized I didn’t particularly appreciate smoking myself. Still later, extensive allergy testing revealed an allergy to tobacco.

Start developing your most important relationship now. If you are unsure how to start, consider journaling. First thing in the morning is the best time to connect with the love that remains inside you. You are worthy.

Hope in this Lunar New Year

Do you feel the hope in this Lunar New Year of the Tiger. For you, how does that make you feel compared to the Ox in 2021 or the Rat in 2020? And why did I call it the Lunar New Year? Hasn’t it always been referred to as the Chinese New Year?

A Little Clarification

The Lunar New Year begins on the day of the first new moon. Although a calendar based on the cycle of the moon has been around for ages, we tend to associate it with China where it is celebrated big time. Whole extended families return home, celebrating together. In fact, we see dragon dances performed in large cities across the globe. And it isn’t a few days. Rather it goes on for over two weeks, culminating in the release of thousands of paper lanterns into the night sky on day fifteen, the night of the first full moon. Read more about this year’s celebration.

What is Your Lunar New Year Symbol?

As a child, I remember my family eating at a Chinese restaurant with paper placemats of the Chinese Zodiac. Each of us would find the year we were born and discover who we were. Well, not really. Still, I always noticed my father and I were both Snakes. Since we shared a curiosity and enjoyment of this creature, it seemed only natural. I’ve researched the elements a little more and found that I’m a Yin Water Snake. Dad was a Yin Earth Snake. Furthermore, all Snakes are Yin and all Tigers are Yan. Read more if you’re curious about the Chinese Zodiac animals.

It’s All About Hope

It’s easy to look at all manner of negativity in life. On the other hand, looking for positivity is just as easy. Last year we were stuck with the Ox and betrayed by the Rat in 2020. I’m counting on hope in this Lunar New Year of the Tiger to lift me to new heights of gratitude, connection, and strength in 2022. How about you?

A Return to the Tried and True

How often have you made a return to the tried and true? And why do we quit these habits in the first place?

Define Tried and True

That’s easy. We’ve done it before (Tried). Furthermore, we know it works (True).

So Why Do We Quit?

It’s really about creating habits versus the unrelenting search for something better.

If you like variety in life, like I do, it’s easy to chase after the new, shiny, 24 carat gold bangle when it drops right in front of you. There’s nothing wrong with that.  Yet, the shiny objects can live in peace next to the comfortable earrings we reach for almost everyday.

How Do We Restart?

  • Slow down.
  • Listen to your intuition.
  • Live in the moment.
  • Look for the joy.

First, we are all very different. Understanding yourself goes a long way toward being successful in your return to the tried and true. How do you start to understand your personality? One of my favorite ways is Clifton Strengths. This is not a free assessment, but well worth the price. If you are more into free, the TypeFinder Personality Test website also links to Enneagram Types.

A Real Life Example

Are you wondering why I have the photo of my bookcase? It’s how I managed to return to my tried and true method for self discovery, Morning Pages. If you look closely, you’ll see the original Artist’s Way book by Julia Cameron on the bottom shelf. Yet, that wasn’t how I started Morning Pages again. Rather, it was seeing the beautiful spine of the journal I pulled out of the many journals on the top row. Royal Botanic Garden SydneyThis journal is important to me. I bought it at the gift shop of the Royal Botanic Garden in Sydney, Australia after I completed my Shoden, Reiki Level One at the International House of Reiki in the Blue Mountains.

For something seemingly unrelated, I’ve been watching Rake, an Australian series on Acorn TV, set in Sydney. It brought back beautiful Sydney memories.