(Originally published on Substack 01/06/2024 8:23 AM)
When we are in grief, holidays can be very difficult. Perhaps 2024 is the year to start celebrating Christmas differently. Looking into one of my favorite carols, The Twelve Days of Christmas, I discovered many interesting ways to change how you might celebrate Christmas.
The origins of the twelve days
During the Middle Ages, the first day of Christmas was December 25th, the day Christians celebrated the birth of Christ, the Son of God. Then, the cumulative song moves through each day until we arrive at the twelfth day of Christmas, January 5th, on the day before Epiphany, when the three wise men arrive at the manger in Bethlehem to honor the Christ child.
Gift-giving was different
In the Catholic tradition during the Middle Ages, gift-giving occurred on the eighth day of Christmas, January 1st, New Year’s Day. On this day, giving gifts to one’s lord, who owned the land where you lived and worked, was commonplace.
The Tudor court was expected to give the king or queen a gift. During the reign of King Henry VIII, court members lavished gifts of food, coins, and even wild animals.
How would this work today? I suppose it would mean honoring the persons who owned where we live and honoring elders. Or perhaps you could start small by changing the day of some gift-giving, leaving Christmas for gifts from Santa Claus.
Fasting and Feasting
While today we prepare for Christmas during Advent, everyone in Tudor times was fasting for a month until just after midnight on Christmas Eve. Then, they would enjoy a festive Christmas feast.
The Feast of St. Stephen
The day after Christmas was a day of remembrance for Saint Stephen, the first Christian martyr known for helping the poor. Traditionally, the second day of Christmas was a day of charity. Churches distributed money from their alms boxes to the poor.
The Feast of St. John
The next day, they celebrated the miracle of St. John, who drank poisoned wine but didn’t become ill. As you might imagine, the celebration involved drinking a special hot ale or cider with sugar, spices, and apples prepared in a wooden bowl. The head of the household took the first drink, shouting, “Wassail!” and then the bowl was passed around to everyone else.
Read more about it.
The English Heritage organization has a webpage devoted to celebrating the Twelve Days of Christmas, where you can read more detail about how each day was observed during the reign of the Tudors.
However, know that it’s perfectly normal to feel differently about celebrating the holidays after losing a loved one.
I’m open to considering some alternative ways of spreading love and joy in the twelve days after Christmas Day.
And today is Epiphany!
As with most religious holidays, this one is celebrated slightly differently in different areas of the world. In Eastern Europe, it often includes a bracing dip in cold waters to remember the baptism of Christ.
Everyone agrees it commemorates the day that the Magi, who were astrologers, also known as the Three Kings, came to see the Christ child using the star as a guide. King Herod secretly sent for them after hearing about their quest. As they left for Bethlehem, they followed the star to the house where the holy family stayed.
The Gospel According to Matthew, chapter 2, verse 10-12 (NRSV)
“When they saw that the star had stopped, they were overwhelmed with joy. On entering the house, they saw the child with Mary, his mother, and they knelt down and paid him homage. Then, opening their treasure chests, they offered him gifts of gold, frankincense, and myrrh. And having been warned in a dream not to return to Herod, they left for their own country by another road.”
Another celebration involving water
Growing up not far from Tarpon Springs, Florida, I was used to watching the annual plunge into Spring Bayou by local boys, aged 16 to 18, who dive in to retrieve a cross thrown into the water by the Greek Orthodox archbishop. It is believed he will be showered with good fortune in the coming year.
You can read more about Spring Bayou here.
Of course, now I understand the rich heritage of many different religious traditions, and I embrace the joy of each one.
May your coming year be filled with discoveries and dreams!